Spare Change - Sacrifice

Following my Spare Change thoughts it is interesting to note that most of us already know this information– saving money, limiting frivolous spending and not purchasing beyond our means. Yet how many of us use this knowledge? Many of us still fail to practice it in our daily lives. Staying in our familiarized patterns and allowing ourselves to be influenced by what everybody else does is the problem. Our society encourages distraction and evasion as a means to experience happiness. Funny thing is that this takes us far away from ourselves and just postpones dissatisfaction.
The norm we created says we must have new jeans and shoes every month to stay on top of fashion and be recognized by others. The norm is we need the latest ipod, phone, camera and computer at home because they have new features that are a must to make our lives easier. The list goes on of the things we think we need to be happier. Combining our irresistible urge to spend along with clever advertising we succumb to buying things we probably don’t need. Telus tells us “The Future is Friendly”. Smart advertising here and people can feel at ease being less intimidated by technology. Best Buy says “Thousands of possibilities. Get yours”. And my personal least favorite I heard on a Wal-Mart commercial by your average sucker consumer “The more I spend, the more I save.” Wow. Think about this for a moment… The words ‘spend’ and ‘save’ do not go together at all. They are complete opposites but still we must consume to feel better about ourselves.

Story: A friend of mine has been servicing debt for as long as I can remember. It is a continuous struggle that I hear of every time we get together. On paper my friend makes much more money than I do but also has more debt than me with a bank account in the negative. A long hard road lies in front of her because she chooses to buy the latest gear to look good and then go out 2-3 nights of the week to show it off spending even more on cabs and entertainment. On top of it she claims to ‘need’ vacations with friends in warm places that really should not be purchased because it is all on credit. In the end, when we speak I see she is truly un-happy with the situation in life and I can only say over and over that self-discipline needs to be practiced.
My friend knows that they spend too much. But what is lacking is actually making the sacrifice to get herself forward. If you want something bad enough in life and see yourself in the future being somewhere different than where you are now make those sacrifices. Just like starting a business, it takes at least 5years of hard building before getting payoffs, to be a great athlete you disipline yourself to eat well, rest and train hard for at least a few years and if you want to limit some of your debts, have more money for the future sacrifices need to be made.

What sacrifices are you making these days to get yourself to where you want to be?

Change or Insanity

It’s not certain if it was Benjamin Franklin or Albert Einstein that defined insanity as doing the same thing over and over again, yet expecting different results. Of course, this quotation is not meant to be taken literally. The quotation in fact encourages trying different avenues in order to get to the results that you want to see. It does not mean that you have to alter your approach completely, but understand that you will have to change your approach if the things you’re currently doing or previously have done are not producing the results/goals that you desire.


Throughout my sporting and academic career I have worked with a number of different people in a variety of settings/atmospheres/age groups/genders/cultures, etc, etc…. What continues to baffle and surprise me is how people will continuously repeat the same behaviour to get to their goal, yet they continue to get the same results, and then do it all over again while expecting a different outcome. This just leads to people becoming extremely unhappy, discouraged, and shocked with their previous results, yet, they continue to think that if they just keep doing what they’re doing, things may change. As the saying goes; “If you continue to do what you have always done, you will continue to get what you have always gotten”


What it comes down to:

If you don’t like the result YOU receive, YOU have to change your approach

How do you get to your goals and see the results you want:

· Be Specific – Define your goals and aspirations

· Be Realistic – understanding how much time you have and all of your responsibilities. What is your priority

· Be Motivated

· Consistent and Persistent action – It’s not going to come to you, you have to go out and get it.

· Be Organized/Prepared – clear the clutter that surrounds you. Be structured.

· Be Prepared - Write a Personal/Action Plan

- Breaking it down into daily, weekly, monthly, yearly
- Involving all spheres of life – Social, Spirtual, Emotional, Physical, Intellectual and Financial


Understand that we are not going to be able to achieve all of our goals and the results we want to see on our first try every time. We will experience failure that is inevitable. It’s what we do with this experience that dictates whether we have learned from it and made the necessary changes to improve our chances of achieving it our next try.

If at first you don’t succeed try and try again…just making sure that you’re learning from your previous attempt

My Day: Why I Love My Job

5am - 10am

• Opened the Facility
• Trained 4hrs
• Raised more money for my goal + 2 contacts
• Integrated new staff member

11am

• Had lunch
• Trainer shows up late to work and quits because of a lack of money
• Do paperwork and start to conduction "exit interview" (why is he leaving)
• Learned a great lesson from a vet leader in "how to ask the right questions"

12pm

• Walk ex-trainer out
• Shake hands with my 12pm consultation
• have a great consultation with a RAVING Fan from the post-partum seminar
• Signed her up for monthly package (she left with her baby boy just stoked)

1pm - 3pm

• trained an hour
• had a great staff meeting with a great company that will help our customers

4pm - 530pm

• 1-on-1 with a VERY inspired teammate due to a group effort
• Spent the time with him to help his future (amazing feeling)
• His eyes are opening...

6pm - 645pm

• Find out about an amazing "push forward" for our company
• Creating MORE opportunities for our people!! Amazing

645pm - 830pm

• Grocery shopping (right on budget $100)
• Made dinner and ate/chatted with my girlfriend
• Found out she has a GREAT new job opportunity

830pm - 930pm

• Sat down to share with all of you
• and let you know how much I grew as a person today
• and how thankful I am I put myself in this challenging and very rewarding position in life
• Thanks to all of you for being a part of it

What did you do/learn today?

learn and live

People come and people go – as any company will have its turnaround of employees. People leave for many reasons – some good, some not so good. By hiring the right person in the first place, only good people will leave your working environment. Good people who have come, taken advantage of the support and systems, passed on their knowledge and skills for others to learn from and left to go onto other exciting opportunities for them. Nothing wrong with this at all. We preach how important it is to be passionate about what you do, and this in turn will lead to success beyond what you dreamed possible. And well, fact of the matter is, not everyone is passionate about what you are passionate about. So they use their great skills to contribute to a higher cause, but eventually something else will call at them and they head in that direction.

Unfortunately not all leave this way. Some were the wrong people from the beginning, or maybe they were thought to be the right person, but now with an entire bus full of the right people, it becomes painstakingly obvious they are the wrong person. They know it, you know it, it’s no secret. Understand that we are only as good as the members in our teams. The more great people, the better off we all are. The unfortunate thing in this situation, is that the individual often doesn’t see the real time work and effort that’s gone into trying to ‘help’ them realize that they can easily become the right person and flourish – it’s easy really, get rid of the ego – realize we all have issues to work on, then just do it – no more excuses, take the feedback and allow others to hold you accountable to what you want to achieve and then (and this is the hard part) execute what you claim you know you are capable of. what happens when someone changes the rules of the game and decides to be the victim - that everyone was out to get them, - those accusations come flying – and those that are trying to help will rightfully step away and quickly watch it figured out..but by then it is too late

What does this mean for us as leaders. Well, don’t expect this person to leave in a good way – in fact they will probably break every rule in the book. Don’t be surprised when they don’t hold up to how they say they want to leave, when for the past year they’ve been saying one thing and turning around to do the complete opposite. And defiantly don’t expect a ‘thank you’ for the time invested – in fact you’ll probably hear your name slandered in future conversations as someone who was ‘mean’ and ‘not very nice.’

The great news and the most fantastic part of all is – that when this person leaves (and people will forget in exactly 14 days), is that life goes on – and we are doing so many great things now by being surrounded by numerous like minded individuals that there is no direction to go but up. No more drama, no more frustrations, no more covering up – time to keep kicking ass for as long as possible! Don’t dwell, don’t wonder where you went wrong. Learn and live for next time....but hopefully there will be no next time!

Spare Change

There was a time when the amount of money I had was a huge focus for me. I would be concerned with how much I got on each paycheck and how much I was spending. I was not satisfied with the amount I earned and continually compared myself to peers who were making more than me. At times I caught myself not wanting to lend a dollar, tracking every dollar that was owed to me and always making sure every bill was split evenly. Somewhere along the way I changed this way of thinking.

Today each month brings me about $3000. Some months I make more and some months less and yearly that gives me about $40,000. In no way is this considered a lot of money. I am far away from being rich but I don’t concern myself with that. If you asked me, if I want to make more I will say yes… But I will also tell you that the amount I earn allows me to get what I need in life to both survive and have a fun time doing it.

I have been lucky that I never owed more than $10,000. That amount has been paid off with some small sacrifices and these days I only owe a visa at $1000. I put aside 10% of every paycheck for the future because it is a priority, I then pay my bills and of what remains I use it to enjoy life and share it with those around me. My attitude is easy come and easy go. Life is so short and money won’t do me any good when I die. I am also confident knowing that I will earn more in the passing of time because I am naturally taking the steps to do so.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not a pushover and will just hand out money to whoever asks for it. Nor do I frivolously spend money on things that I do not need. And I do not purchase things that exceed my earnings (unlike many who will buy something for $25 when they only $20 in their pocket). Yet I will tell you that if you need a red note I will give it to you without worry. If I lost a brown note on the ground it will piss me off for a moment. If a plane ticket costs $1000 to visit my family then so be it because I can’t take money with me when I die and in the greater scheme of things these amounts are nothing more than spare change. There is more where that came from for a hardworking individual who is ready to earn it and makes money doing what he loves to do.

How to counsel yourself in life and work

The key points were taken from a Journal about taking charge of your life and work

Tips for counseling yourself:

1. The quality of our relationship to ourselves is the mirrow to which others reflect. Be in touch with your feelings because they tell you who you really are
2. You are not powerless in choosing your life conditions - we do have choices and they are the secret of our power
3. We must be aware if we are living true to ourselves 
4. Life and work planning is a life-long and continuous proces - to feel alive, you must resist becoming satisfied too long. You must continue seeking to grow
5. Create a life map (Personal plan)
6. Must decide by which criteria we want our success measured
7. Must establish a solid support systems (surround yourself with like-minded individuals)
8. Must take risks that will keep you in a positive and creative cycles of growth
9. Must be developing a Plan B even before you have achieved Plan A
10. You do not have to play the victim in life. Dare to dream and create your future
11. Work from a clear sense of purpose, therefore creating a enduring meaning and satisfaction
12. A clear sense of purpose creates integrity - therefore walking your talk on a daily basis
13. Stress comes mainly from reactive living. Stress can either break you down or energize you; the difference is how you perceive it
14. The Key to balance is doing Little Things consistently. Effectiveness is built or destroyed by tiny things that become a pattern
15. The bottom line is that it comes down to living with Integrity. It comes from keeping the small promises that we make to ourselves

Trainer 2 Manager

I have had some definite "Uh HA" moments over the last 2 months that I would like to share with all of you...

Self:

• Things are not more manageable when you don't have to train 8hrs / do your logs / emails / with your customers base. When managing there are always "things" to do and often more than 1 at a time...
• When managing - all the coaches become your customer base that you need to lead / challenge / hold accountable / and you need to do this each day
• The feeling of accomplishment is much different, and you rely on your "to do list" and your "to be list" to get that feeling...not the great training hour you just delivered

Team:

• You now set the highest example for the facility
• You make the decisions - the hard decisions (tough when it hurts your friends paycheck)
• Sitting down and helping a teammate work through their situations in life and work is very rewarding!!

Operations:

• All the things that "someone else" will do - you become that "someone"
• Positive all the time! Everything is under control attitude
• Knowing when to ask questions and when to answer your own questions
• Systems!! learn to LOVE THEM! (your new bible) - the Management Manual now makes sense...

Customers:

• They all have their opinions on "how you've changed" or what you "should" be doing
• You have to remind them that change is not bad (such a weird stigma)

All in all, if you enjoy a challenge you will love the change...

Act, Believe, and BE

An old track coach of mine had an important rule for us while we raced. It was our first day at practice when he explained what it was he wanted from us.

The ‘golden rule’ was this: 'NO DRAMA'

When we raced and we crossed the finish line we were not allowed to show ‘that we were beat.’ No hands on knees, leaning over and gasping for breath, no staggering off of the track – in fact we were expected to give it our all – but not show it. If we were going to collapse, puke, etc we better walk off of the track with our head high, and head straight to the back of the bleachers where no one could see. If we were pissed off at ourselves about our race we were to not show that either – no tantrums, no sulking off of the track. Instead, congratulate the other racers, and again head behind the bleachers to do what you need to do (I’ll admit I’ve thrown a track shoe or two at a wall, behind the bleachers, with no one around).

In other words NO DRAMA! No excuses, no whining, no collapse - no drama whatsoever! We were better than that. At the time we were one of the top ranked track teams – and to see us racing and walking off of the track with heads held high, smiles and congratulations while the other teams created drama all around them was pretty powerful. We would finish a race, and everyone else would immediately collapse or stagger away and we would walk. Walk with pride, walk with strength, and walk because giving in and giving up was not an option.

Hey, I’m not saying it was easy – it was extremely hard at first – especially when every muscle in your body is screaming and begging you to stop moving, when as you’re walking you can hardly breathe, when you can feel as if you’re 2 seconds from passing out if you don’t put your head between your knees. It was also hard to not show you were pissed off and upset about your race. The funny thing was, that the pain subsided after only moments. The feelings of needing to be upset about the race disappeared (after a few track shoes thrown, I never felt that need again.. why emotionally beat yourself up?). We were capable of so much more – and this ‘rule’ made us realize it. The other teams, in contrast, thought they had nothing more to give – they BELIEVED they were beaten. So did we at first – but after several track meets, these thoughts turned around for us to BELIEVE we could do more – and we did.

When explaining the need for this ‘rule’ he told us that we were one of the top teams – and if we weren’t then we sure as hell better start acting like we were. Only after acting like we were the best and showing that we had more to give would we become the best. And this meant eliminating any drama. Only when we were ‘doing’ what we wanted to become on a day to day basis would we ever ‘BE’ that.. huh.. sound familiar? Does 24/7 leader come to mind? Also, he told us that by eliminating this need for drama in front of a crowd would we be more likely to focus on tangible solutions to the problem. Rather than drawing attention to the reaction (throwing shoes at a wall because you’re upset with yourself), focus on what you need to do to be better (different workouts, more speed, etc). And better we all became!

In conclusion – yes, our track team was the best team, we were the team that was viewed by all the other teams as unstoppable – nothing could get in our way. But it all started by practicing day in and day out what we wanted to become – in fact his rule was not just for racing – it was for every practice, every run, every situation we were in – every day we needed to act, believe, and finally we would BE the greatest team.

Be the Hammer in Life, not the Nail

One of the best pieces of advice I had gotten in the last 4 years was to think of myself as the hammer rather than the nail. Let me explain with a personal example:

It was the same 1pm hour each Thursday. I would be training David, a 65 year old gentleman during one of the busiest loudest hours at the facility. This hour drove me crazy sometimes because a)he was hard of hearing b)didn’t like the music being played c)I am not the loudest person to yell over what was very loud music and d) to make it worse, he had a list of injuries needing attention that required a high level of communication through speaking. Each week I felt like I was giving him a disservice because of the communication barrier. I began to become frustrated during the hour and I know he sensed it. This was not a good situation to be in because I let the frustration get the better of me and after each hour I would be disappointed for letting myself become that impatient and angry.
I spoke to my manager Curtis at the time and told him how I could not do that hour anymore. He simply said that in each situation that life presents we have the choice to be a hammer or the nail. This made total sense. I can be beaten each and every Thursday by the situation making me the nail or can turn the situation around and be the hammer and making Thursdays my nail. It was all about creating SOLUTIONS. My choices were: Turn the music down, go outside for the hour or change his time to a less busy time. These were such simple ideas that I should have thought of long ago. After a few weeks David and I found another time that was less busy and actually suited his personal schedule much better than Thursdays at 1pm. Less people, lighter music, we go outside sometimes and we have both benefited from the change. He enjoys the quiet, I can coach him effectively and I look better than that person who was frustrated all the time.

What situations have you been in lately where you felt as though you were a nail? What solutions can you come up with to make you the hammer? An important thing to take away from this lesson is that each one of us in life has the ability to make a CHOICE. Choose not to be the nail. Choose to be a hammer making each negative situation under your control. You will experience a greater level of satisfaction and be more effective with moving yourself forward in life.

Lead By Example

Nothing builds and sustains credibility like a boss who leads by example. Whether you take the time to chat with new employees in the staffroom, or are the first to ask the hard questions, you alone are responsible for setting company standards and expectations.

Actions still speak louder than words, particularly when your philosophies and behavior motivate people to do their best work. Doing otherwise only confuses staff and slows momentum.

Here are 10 useful strategies for modeling behavior that will inspire our employees to work hard, maintain loyalty, and help our company grow:

1. Lead with honesty. Promote an office environment of truthfulness. Anything less than honest communication should not be tolerated.

2. Surround Yourself with Great People. The most successful leaders surround themselves with capable, trustworthy People, who can make great decisions. Don’t be afraid to listen, especially when it’s the kind of news you don’t like or weren’t expecting to hear. When your employees see that you listen, they will listen, too. Also, choose a diverse group representing different perspectives. That encourages your employees to act accordingly.

3. Always take responsibility. The best way for a leader to lose credibility is to play the blame game. If you blow it, admit it. If you forgot, admit that, too. In other words, step up to the managerial plate every time. This encourages everyone to accept responsibility and accountability.

4. Don’t be afraid to praise. Being the boss doesn’t mean that you should withhold positive feedback. Everyone needs a pat on the back now and then, not just your star performers. The more you give out gold stars, the more you’ll notice motivated employees who continue do good work and recognize each other’s value.

5. Create an inspirational culture. If you want people to be inspired, motivated, and charged up, adopt an inspirational attitude. Infuse your language (including written communication) with passion and purpose. Let people know that you’re excited about what the company is doing, whether it’s a new product launch, sponsorship or recognition in a magazine.

6. Articulate the mission. Once you give employees the language of success, they can communicate the company’s mission. Help them understand their roles in the company’s success. Be direct so that they are confident you have a clear vision for the company’s goals and objectives.

7. Be inclusive. Show your team how to resolve issues in a collaborative manner. Model active listening and provide constructive feedback. Find ways to help people feel closely connected to the actions and processes being used to accomplish company goals, so they'll collaborate with each other.

8. Share the rewards. If the company is doing well, initiate a bonus plan; this will give employees a stake in the company’s continued success. Sharing the rewards also reinforces your appreciation for people’s hard work, commitment, and company loyalty. It induces employees to rely on each other to make things happen.

9. Roll up your sleeves. Show that when a job needs to be done, everyone at every level needs to chip in and participate. Do your part, and make sure that what needs to get done, gets done.

10. Demonstrate integrity. Inspiring your employees is important, but they must believe in you as well. They’ll look up to you if you fulfill your commitments, even if it’s something as basic as showing up for a scheduled meeting.

Motivate Yourself - Others Can't

The following information is from a book that I'm currently reading called; "Principles of Self-Management : The Key to Personal and Professional Success"

Here is a breakdown of some of the key points in this chapter:

• There are two basic modes of motivation - "push" vs "pull", or "avoidance" vs "approach"
• Motivation is typically grounded in two impulses: Fear (of failure, of unpleasant consequence) and Desire (for "success", for pleasant consequences)
• Every individual has a different motivational makeup
• Fear of failure can be a very powerful motivation - but it can also immobilize a person
• The key for the self-manager is to discover one's motivations and to assume the role of and responsibility for self-reinforcement
• You can't motivate other people, you can however reinforce their behavior in hopes of confirming their own motivations

External Motivation:

• External motivation only have short-term effects
• Typically lose their power as we move away form the negative possibilities that frightened us into action or attracted
• People who are primarily  motivated by externals, and don't provide their own reasons for continued effort and growth, are likely to ride a roller coaster of highs and lows
• Provide little in the way of lasting satisfactions
• People that are dependent on external reinforcements/motivation, require it constantly
• Once goal is achieved - they no longer possess any genuine attraction resulting thoughts of something else, something better, has been withheld
• The more we look to others for recognition or approval, the less we are likely to supply our own approval

The Power of Internal Motivation:

• Never-ending and constantly reinforcing
• Finding ways to motivate from within
• Self-approval is the key to self-management
• Difficult to practice
• By internalizing reinforcement, one will be able to replace external rewards with internal.
• An aspect of accomplishment can be discovered in even the most monotonous or routine activities
• Internal motivation capitalizes on the sense of accomplishment

Effective self-manager have a balance of 90% Internal and 10% External.  

The chapter ends off with the ideal relationship between Motivation, Behavior and Reinforcement

Motivation <->Behavior <-> Reinforcement

In this cycle, one's motivation drives the behavior one decides is required.  The completion of the behavior provides the reinforcement which is the feeling of satisfaction and achievement. This in turn confirms and strengthens the original motivation.

The cycle of internal self-reinforcement operates continuously and does not change to external circumstances.

Vision

"Vision is the art of seeing the invisible", Jonathan Swift

This picture was on my wall all through university and I still keep the quote in all my day timers to this day.

It reminds me to stop taking things at surface or face value. It makes me ask a few more questions and look beyond what people want me to see.

Think about some comments that you hear on a daily basis: "How's it going today?"..."Not bad" = what makes it "not bad?"

"What's up Kris?"..."Not much" = Really? seems like you have a lot going on to me.

Body language plays a large role in our job's as coaches, how we push and challenge customers each day. What do you do when you see a frown or a smile? or eyes that don't look up from the floor?

Don't let people get-away with surface answers and don't let their body language go unnoticed -challenge them more than that...

The Right People – who you are is what you attract

Effective leaders are always on the lookout for good people. We all have a list in our head of what kind of people we would like to have in our organization – and chances are that list is very similar. What is your perfect employee? What qualities do they possess? Would you be surprised that is doesn’t matter what you want – that it’s more determined by who you are? Are you a leader – chances are you’ll attract similar people. Are you exciting and have good work ethic – same thing; like attracts like.

Do you have a team full of excited and motivating individuals who want to be better – chances are it’s because you possess these traits and are attracting these qualities out of those you are leading. Of course we all are different and have opposing strengths/weaknesses to balance each other out (and this is vital and important in a successful organization). But those that are drawn to you probably have more similarities then differences. For example, if you think that you have a team of negative people who are not very exciting and motivating, then you better take a look at your own attitude and demeanour.

Several areas that are important to have in common and attract:

1.attitude: People who view life as a series of opportunities and exciting challenges are not going to be attracted to those that don’t. And vice versa, those that do will not stick around long for those that don’t. I don’t want to hear others talk about how bad things are all the time – especially if we are trying to reach a common goal

2.values: People are attracted to leaders whose values are similar to theirs. It doesn’t matter whether the shared values are positive or negative – either way, the attraction is strong. Think about adolf hitler – he was a very strong leader, but his values were terrible; and hence he attracted like minded individuals who also had terrible values.

3. leadership ability: people naturally follow people stronger then themselves. If you are not a very good leader, then chances are you are inhibiting the eventual leadership ability of those you are leading

How do the people you are currently leading look to you? Are they the strong, capable and potential leaders we desire? Or could they be better? Remember, their quality does not depend on a hiring process - although that will narrow it down to those that possess the potential, which leaves it up to us to mentor. The ultimate success in creating a great leader depends on us. If the people we are leading could use some work and improvement then it’s time to look at ourselves and start by improving that.

Can you be counted on?

We are in the business of helping people. People come to us for the expertise and guidance we offer in the realm of lifestyle management. In our daily interactions we face many situations in which we are required to go above and beyond the training hour to help people get to where they want to be. It is a reality that we must be aware of but most importantly, follow through on.

Weather during the training hour or in your personal life it is easy to be engaged in conversation and forget about little things you say you will do. Not being mindful on your words and forgetting, (no matter how small your promise) can lead to a loss of credibility by over-promising and under-delivering.

Examples:
-I will call your physio and learn more about your injury. What is her number?
-Your program will be completed by your next workout.
-Customer says they want to try trail running and you say “I’ll get you some info”
-I will call Keith at NSA and have a pair put aside for you.
-Check your email, by tonight I will send you the itinerary for the Grand Canyon.

Whatever it might be, no matter how big or small, if you say you will do something for somebody then do it. With this you will more than likely get points in other peoples books when you do what you say especially when it is above and beyond. If you know that you are not able to deliver something within a certain timeframe then do not say you will do it. If you are the type of person who forgets things talked about then write it down immediately to ensure that it is not overlooked and that it gets completed. After all, your word is riding on it.

Barriers to Communication

I came across this a while back and thought it was a great tool.


Nothing is so simple that it cannot be misunderstood

Anything that prevents understanding of the message is a barrier to communication. Many physical and psychological barriers exist:


Culture, background, and bias - We allow our past experiences to change the meaning of the message. Our culture, background, and bias can be good as they allow us use our past experiences to understand something new, it is when they change the meaning of the message then they interfere with the communication process.

Noise - Equipment or environmental noise impede clear communication. The sender and the receiver must both be able to concentrate on the messages being sent to each other. (Focus)

Ourselves - Focusing on ourselves, rather than the other person can lead to confusion and conflict. The "Me Generation" is out when it comes to effective communication. Some of the factors that cause this are defensiveness (we feel someone is attacking us), superiority (we feel we know more that the other), and ego (we feel we are the center of the activity). (make it about them)

Perception - If we feel the person is talking too fast, not fluently, does not articulate clearly, etc., we may dismiss the person. Also our preconceived attitudes affect our ability to listen. We listen uncritically to persons of high status and dismiss those of low status. (Ego)

Message - Distractions happen when we focus on the facts rather than the idea. Our educational institutions reinforce this with tests and questions. Semantic distractions occur when a word is used differently than you prefer. For example, the word chairman instead of chairperson, may cause you to focus on the word and not the message. (Know your audience)

Smothering - We take it for granted that the impulse to send useful information is automatic. Not true! Too often we believe that certain information has no value to others or they are already aware of the facts. (Stopping the FLOW - Funnel)

Stress - People do not see things the same way when under stress. What we see and believe at a given moment is influenced by our psychological frames of references - our beliefs, values, knowledge, experiences, and goals.


These barriers can be thought of as filters, that is, the message leaves the sender, goes through the above filters, and is then heard by the receiver. These filters muffle the message. So we must be sure our message is received the way we intended it.

Putting on your game face

Last year I saw a special on ESPN about the great Jim Brown (Cleveland Browns 1957-1956), who is widely considered the best running back, if not athlete of all time.

What impressed me about the show was not so much his stats and highlights but the story of his preparation for each and every practice and game. What I took most from this special was his professionalism, his approach, his leaderships, how he understood the mental aspect as well as understanding how those around him were effecting by his actions and abilities.

Here is someone who was playing in the NFL when there was a minority of African-American players. So it's pretty fair to say that he dealt with racism far greater than we have ever seen, heard or experienced in our lives. Also, players back then were not set up on multi-million dollar contracts with insurance policy's to fall back on. Most players worked second jobs. Basically, if you got injured, tough luck!...and unlike today where you have Replay footage and heavy officating, player's dealt with being cleated, eyes gouged out, being speared after the play was finished, etc, etc....

Jim Brown understood that he was a gifted individual not only physically but mentally as well. The epsiode on Brown highlighted how he got up after each and every tackle the exact same way (taking 10-15 seconds to get up). Regardless if he slipped up or got nailed in the numbers, he would get up if it were the exact same as the previous play.

Brown did this so that no one around him, both his opponents and his own team mates would know if was hurt by the hit because he never changed his approach/reaction....therefore leading those to believe he was unbreakable.

Also, Brown never received treatment from the medical/training staff while any of his team mates or media were around. He would come 2 hours before every player arrived for practice to get treatments so that they would not know he was hurt or required some aid.

What I'm trying to get at is that we all have the ability to leave our baggage (because we all have things going on in our lives in some form or another) at the door to prevent attention being drawn to ourself. This just leads to affecting the facility, the customers and our team mates all in a negative manner. There is a time and place for everything to be sorted and trying to do so when you're on the training floor is only detrimental to your team, the overall energy, the customer's experience (their not hear to listen to our problems), but also yourself.

Being the leaders of IF, it starts with us and it trickles down to all of those around us whether it be a lack of energy we display, a change in mood, crying, complaining, lack of work ethic, mediocre training sessions, etc, etc...

We must be on our top game 24/7 if we want to lead both our team mates and ourselves to the next level.

Using this forum group and our management in place to find solutions to our own personal situations during 1-0n-1 meetings, forum meetings, coffee's/lunch/dinners outside of the facility are all great avenues for us to handle our own situations properly.

Jim Brown could have been the star player who acted all dramatic when he was hit hard or could have let everyone know the abuse he took both mentally and physically week in and week out during his illustrious career. However, he chose to go the other path of dealing with it in the proper manner where he still produced at an extraordinary level, leading all of those around him, winning championships and also still finding the right time to take care of the things that needed to be addressed.

We all have the same ability.

When we step into the facility doors and wear our IF jersey's, it's time to leave our personal baggage at the door and take care of business.

Empowering Others Minus The Ego

‘The best executive is the one who has sense enough to pick good men to do what he wants done, and self – restraint enough to keep from meddling with them while they do it’
-Theodore Roosevelt


Secure leaders are able to give power to others. We see this model happening everyday in our business. From owners giving power to managers, who give power to role players, who give power to coaches, etc. But where does this go wrong – often one thing stands in the way of this model having the most success (in fact, it’s the same thing that stands in the way of most people’s success): EGO.

It’s your ego that tells you:
‘no, that’s my job, they can’t have credit for that.’
‘i’m better at that anyways, so I’ll do it’
‘why is this person trying to do my job, I’m supposed to do that’
‘I’m the leader/mentor, I couldn’t possibly learn anything from them’

And it’s funny, because the leaders that feel threatened and let their ego get in the way are usually the ones who have the most to worry about, and in turn not being the great leaders they could be if they would lose the ego. Those that are able to step back and see that there is no power in ‘one’ and that we all play very important and integral roles, will notice a lot more being accomplished – tangible and intangible. When you have great players on your team you don’t have to worry about someone taking your place because you are all working together towards a common goal. Take back the reins and see what happens – everyone becomes each others yings and yangs, and we all learn from each other. and this is what we all do well in our situations. We see potential role players/great coaches flourish when given the reins – great ideas we never knew they had are surfaced, they gain new confidence and more great things happening. We see this happening all the time. But unfortunately, as in any situation, we see the flipside happen as well. We are all mentors and leaders to someone at some point, but we can not always be there mentor and should not feel threatened when they are now doing a great job at what you did for them. We have some GREAT up and coming coaches – in due time they will have the reins, and we have to be confident in our teachings to give them full control and watch them flourish and be proud that we helped them get there.


A quick story: “Henry Ford was not so well known for his ego – which was the cause of his company’s eventual downfall. In fact he was the complete opposite of an empowering leader. He would undermine his company leaders and look over the shoulders of his people. This became a pattern in his leadership – anytime an executive gained power or influence, Henry would support the executives subordinates or publically humiliate him. As one Ford president commented on after leaving the company ‘ Henry Ford, as I would learn first hand, had a nasty habit of getting rid of strong leaders’ “


Only empowered people can reach their full potential. When a leader can’t or won’t empower others, then barriers are created that cannot be overcome. If the barriers remain long enough, then the people give up, or they move on to somewhere else where they can use their full potential. True empowerment and one of the greatest things is giving others the credit. Only very secure leaders are able to do this. Ego gets in the way because many people gain their personal value and esteem from their work or position – and by threatening to change that, is to threaten their self worth. We can surround ourselves with just as strong, influential, empowering, and motivating people so that we can all learn off of each other and challenge each other to grow better.

Empowerment is powerful – and not only for the person being developed, but also for the mentor who will one day come to see their ‘protégé’ succeeding. And when that day comes that your protégé has their own protégé’s they are empowering and leading – embrace it and celebrate it. Don’t jockey for your ‘past’ position with this person. Don’t let ego get in the way of your success – everyone can learn something from everyone, and no one is above or beneath anyone in terms of what knowledge they have to share.

"The Breakfast Club" - Empowering Others

Most people have heard of Michael Jordan. Most people know he lead the Bulls to 6 NBA Championships. One of the ways he did this was by making those around him better. This article I am sharing with you today is from an email sent to me when I was playing basketball at the University of Ottawa in 2000. We were one of the worst teams in the country that year. We had a lot of talent, but we were all individuals (typical of underachieving teams).

This email was sent to a select few on the team and the end of the year...and I believe it was the catalyst that turn the Ottawa U basketball program around, from last in the country to a 7th ranking in Canada!
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What is The Breakfast Club?

Most guys dreaded their two-hour practice from 11 to 1. But a small group of guys, who really wanted to push themselves, formed this Breakfast Club thing. They’d work out a few times a week before practice. Then, when they were done working out, some time between 9 and 9:15, Michael’s chef cooked them breakfast. That’s how it really became the Breakfast Club. Those guys sat down to eat breakfast together, and then they’d go the Berto Center for practice.

Where did The Breakfast Club meet?


Michael had a full gym in his basement. It just made sense to work out there, because the team practiced at the Berto Center, which is about 15 minutes from Michael’s house. When did they? Three to four days a week, Tim actually drove from downtown Chicago to Michael’s house. They’d put in a good, hard hour of lifting, starting between 7:30 and 8:00 a.m. They didn’t do heavy lifting, but instead a lot of agility work, quick reps, light weights—just stuff to build strength they could carry throughout the year.
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This was not about the extra workouts, or the breakfast with Michael...it was about one guy saying, "I can't take this team to the top on my own". I have to show them how to be better than me...what it takes to go the extra mile...and what is means to be a team.

1. Spend the time and helps those around you grow.
2. Lead by example (from my last blog)
3. It starts with a small few, but will quickly grow

3 Disciplines

Over the past few years I have accepted 3 rules to live by in order to stay effective, progress forward, and to remain energized. If I but stray from one of them I find myself becoming overwhelmed, tired, or falling behind. When I remain true to these disciplines I see myself moving forward, feeling healthy and able to do my job leading people at 100%. I want to share this with you….

1)Plan:
We have all heard this before and know how important it is to plan your time both long-term and short-term. During the peak of my graffiti art years I used to plan every piece by drawing before hand and prepping all my colors. When asked why I follow such detail I would reply "the man with a plan is the one who doesn't waste a can". In other words, no wasted paint (time). Turns out, my work was always on point and my reputation was amongst others was the one who was always different - planning ahead of time rather than the same ol' piece.
The same goes for the 24hr period we have each day. Plan your piece, how it will start, what fills will you put into it and how you want it to end. This happens through the use of our day-timer and I for one am a huge follower of it. Seeing your day even closer at a micro level how will you make each hour of training different? Do you arrive early to review the logs, programs, goals and plan something different? Or do you roll in right on time and do the same workout?
When we take the time to make the plan we feel ourselves being effective with out time and moving forward. There is one disclaimer with all of this: Any plan can have a wrench thrown into the spokes. Be prepared for this and be ready to adapt on the spot. The wall might be smaller than anticipated and you have to shorten your letters, you might arrive and see you are training 8hrs instead of 7hrs and you might plan a specific workout yet find the customer come in with their 80year mother.

2)Prioritize:
It is so easy to throw a plan together yet the challenge is to put one together that emphasizes the must-do items get done first. Before using some of the fun colors in the fill (the baby blues, the nice purples) of my piece I was painting I had to make sure I got my sketch down first. This was hard and took a bit of concentration. Getting this completed well would ensure that anything I did after would not matter as much because the most important part was done. I could relax at that point and have fun.
In real life it is no different. Yet it is so easy for us to get side tracked by the fun stuff which puts the important stuff aside for that much longer. In the end it only leads to more stress knowing that you did not handle the most important thing first. Each day, get your workout over with first, you will feel a sense of accomplishment and approach the rest of the day feeling good. Opening your email to send an important follow-up will you first check all the easy fun emails or will you take care of priority 1 first? Take the time to get the most important items done first – these are usually the ones that take a bit more concentration and focus yet are also the ones that will move us forward.

3)Rest
The day only has 24hrs. We are not machines and that can operate each hour of the entire day. Somewhere in there we must rest our body and mind. We sometimes get a burst of energy that allows us to burn the candle at both ends but the harsh reality is that eventually it will catch up with us if you continue. It might show through stress, being agitated easily, sickness or injury.
Everyone is different, I have been one who must get at least 7hrs a night. When I follow my plan and get to bed on time, I feel great the next day. I am able to come to the facility, mentally and physically sharp ready to motivate and energize those around me.
Proper rest allows you to follow your plan better too. It can be a catch 22. If you fail to plan & execute your rest you fail to deliver on your plan the following day. And nobody wants this it just back-jams all of your priorities and you fall behind.

Thanks for reading.

Delivering Information

Delivering Information

It’s all about the Audience

Always think about who the audience is.

Make the message about them not about yourself.

• When the message is about them, they are more likely to pay attention and absorb the information.
  

Include the audience in the solution - Present the problem, and then ask for their input.

• Even if their ideas are not necessarily implemented, they appreciate being a part of the process.

Information can always be interpreted positively (how we intend it to be received) or (a way which we do not intend)…. Try to ensure that your delivery prevents the later as much as possible.